How to talk to guys can seem like one of the great mysteries of the universe, but it’s really not that hard. It can be nerve-racking to approach a guy you like but if you take the time to realize that he’s a person just like you and that he might be nervous about talking to you too, it won’t be so hard.
The problem with starting up a conversation is that we put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect because we’re afraid of being judged. Unfortunately, the more we let that pressure build, the more likely it is to trip us up.
How Does He Think
So the first step in starting up a conversation with a guy is understanding how men think. Men, for the most part, are very sensory driven. They see things on the surface level and tend to put more emphasis on them. They also have a need to be in control. This stems from the whole “men are hunters, women are gatherers” idea, which is based in fact. Men are used to being the providers and they need to have their egos stroked so that they feel better about themselves. If you want to know how to talk to a guy you like, you need to bear all of this in mind.
Are You Peeking?
The most important step in approaching any guy is being yourself. You can try to put on a false front and put out a perfect image of yourself, but if it’s not the real you then it won’t hold up and once the real you starts peeking through, you risk turning him off for being phony. How to talk to guys, then, begins with being honest. You are just fine the way you are and if he really likes you, he’ll accept you for who you are so why not give him that chance right from the start?
You’re On the Same Level
Approach him openly and honestly and try and spark a casual conversation. Understanding how men think helps us realize that they don’t like phoniness. They don’t want to be under excess pressure any more than we do, so trying to live up to a false image can just stress both of you out. Talk to him on his level and keep things relaxed. You don’t have to get into heavy topics immediately and you don’t have to tell him your entire life story either. Remember, it always pays to leave him wanting a little more.
Making the Right Impression
Do you want to know how to talk to a guy you like? Try and stay calm, smile and make sure you make eye contact. That doesn’t mean stare at him, but do make occasional, fleeting contact so that he knows you are actually listening. That’s all part of that ego stroking that is so important to most guys. If you can make him feel appreciated and feel that he matters to you, you’ll go a long way toward making a good impression. How to talk to guys is about more than what you say, it’s also about how you say it and how you listen.
All good communication is a two-way street and making sure that you listen as well as talk is a sign of true respect that anyone can appreciate. You can also score points by making physical contact. Lightly brushing his arm or leaning your hand casually on his shoulder while you talk always heightens the experience. Again, you don’t want to go overboard and look like you’re falling all over him, keep it subtle and casual. This all comes from understanding how men think, which is usually with their senses. Stirring up any of his senses can help to gain his attention big time.
To Crude or Not to Crude
Another important part of knowing how to talk to a guy you like is realizing that manners count. Guys don’t like girls who are pushy, overbearing or foul-mouthed. It may seem cliché, but they prefer a girl who is polite, demure and friendly. That doesn’t mean you have to go overboard batting your eyelashes and blushing, but not constantly using bad language, not always complaining about problems in your life and not seeming completely disinterested or haughty will all work in your favor.
How to talk to guys is not something with exact instructions. You need to take things a step at a time and adjust to each specific situation. What works with one guy may not necessarily work with another, so you have to learn to read his signals and respond appropriately.
It’s not simple, but if you can just take a deep breath and remember to be yourself, you’ll find that you can break the ice and get the conversation started with any guy. It may seem like the hardest thing in the world, but it could just be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.